Each year I start school with lectures from most of my teachers about respect. As I have gotten older, they have gotten more and more harsh.
For instance, I just came from a class where the teacher is trying really hard to instill the idea of respect in these soon-to-be college students. While my friends and I tend to goof off, when learned at a young age that if we really want to socialize then we should let the teacher hurry and say whatever they want to say and then we can talk! Alas, just like every other day the rest of the class couldn’t control themselves and we got book work.
Everything I seem to be is contradicted in my other side. I hold the skills that are so rare in the classmate from my example. I know how to listen and use critical thinking to figure out the obvious, instead of wait for someone to come along and hold my hand and tell me what everything means. But listening is not the subject matter, the subject matter is respect.
I have been told that I am fairly good at it. I know when is okay to talk and when is not. Its easy to joke around in a class setting here but I know that in a real job I can’t say 90% of what I say. I know when the time comes to be serious and when the time comes to have fun.
The thing is, I don’t see how any of this is hard to grasp. It has always come easy to lots of people that I know and I just picked up on it from them. I thought it was something everyone knew but between school and work I have learned that disrespect is common nature and that shouldn’t be how it is.
Another thing I want to cover is that I’m not all goody two shoes about it. It sounds like I’m respectful to all, but let me be clear that I am not. Everyone, young and old alike, need to earn my respect. Sometimes, it’s automatic. I feel respect for them because I feel like they know more than me. But more often than not, that respect is dashed in the face of reality. Most of the time, it has come from teachers. In one case, my dad no longer has my respect.
The thing is, respect is earned on an individual case. You don’t just go to school for however many years and then demand respect from everyone, like most of my home school’s teachers seem to think. You have to prove to me that you know how to use that degree and to be honest none of them do.
That doesn’t mean that if I get a job in the industry and my boss proves me to me he/she doesn’t know what they are talking about, then I will disrespect them. This situation calls for psuedo-respect. I know how to be respectful based on the people I actually do respect, so I just mirror these actions. Does this mean I feel any of it? Well, no.
I seemed to veer off topic, when given the subject I was reminded of how angry I was a couple months back when someone demanded real respect from me, but on no real basis.
Respect is a very touchy thing. It’s easy to fake, easy to lose, hard to gain, and makes people out to be arrogant. Keep in mind, I am of the few people that think this way. If you get respect just because you have lived 100+ years then kudos for you.